...So I Googled "My Dryer Smells Like Fish."

Yea, I couldn't come up with a better intro for this than my title, so... I did. I googled "my dryer smells like fish."

It's a strange story, but what here isn't? The last few times we ran the dryer, the entire house was filled with this strange odor. Imagine, if you will, an open can of tuna left in the Louisiana sun in June for a week, then condensed into a fragrance spray that was then liberally poured over every surface in my house.

The stench was nauseating.

It's bizarre, too, because why would our dryer smell like fish? We don't own fish, we don't eat fish, and when we do we don't cook it in the dryer. We don't even live near water. Did some suicidal fish somehow hitchhike to our dryer vent to off itself in the smelliest way possible?

This is why I asked google, the repository of all knowledge. Would you believe I'm not the only person whose dryer smells like fish? Try 764,000 results.

From a preliminary look, it appears the problem might be a fuse going bad. Although why it smells like fish is beyond me... hey, who am I to argue with Dr. Google?

Sometimes my life is just too strange for words...

See my disclosure statement for more information.

My New Hair!

Thanks to L'Oreal for sponsoring my post about my favorite beauty looks, tips and tricks! Check out Makeup.com for beauty advice from the experts.

OMG I'm so happy! For years, I've wanted to do something kind of crazy to my hair- pink chunks, red chunks, maybe blue. I've dyed my hair in the past, but always stuck to mostly normal colors.


When I was approached with the opportunity to write about a daring beauty look I wanted to try, I knew what I wanted to do. I get to share it with all of you, too! How fantastic is that?


I decided to use a kit from Splat color, although I think the L'Oreal Color Rays would work just as well. I got the kit with three colors- red, blue, and burgundy. This turned out to be a bit of a problem, as you'll see... in fact, this process was problem after problem- all user error! But more about that soon...


I started this process with long hair- SUPER long hair. My hair was hip-length at the longest, and I realized about a month ago that the weight of my hair was giving me headaches. So, being the DIY-type person I am, I grabbed my shears and started cutting. I only cut a few inches at a time, but ended up cutting off over 10" over the course of three weeks.

My hair ended up bra-length and layered, and lots of fun. Then came the bleaching. Since I wasn't sure if one round would lighten my brown hair enough, I split the bleach into two portions, saving about half for the next time. It did take two times, although I think that might be because I'm just not that good at coloring my hair! But it turned out blonde enough to scare the heck out of me... :D


Then I opened the color packet and started applying... and MAN that stuff is bright! My husband could hear me laughing, because it was really fun. Unfortunately, I didn't have quite enough to really saturate the hair, which made the red seem sort of faded even the first day. If I were doing this over, I'd have chosen a single color, rather than the kit with three. Again, no big deal- I can run to Sally Beauty and pick up a bottle of dye to refresh with.

Once I was finished, I went back and forth trying to decide if I loved it or hated it. It's a huge change, but overall I think I really like it! It's fun, and crazy, and it's just the change I wanted! However, I do have some tips to help you, if you decide to do something like this:


1: Enlist help! Sectioning hair, getting the bleach and foils on, applying the color... it's not easy! Having extra hands is something I would call a necessity.


2: Read the instructions ahead of time. I did, and still found myself going back to the instructions for timing and so on.


3: Do it when you don't have to be somewhere the next day. That way, if it's something you hate, you have time to fix it!


The bottom line is simple- you get one chance at this life, and it's just hair. Cut it, color it, do whatever... it will grow out. Don't wait your whole life wanting to do something!

Thanks L'Oreal for giving me the opportunity to do this!

See my disclosure statement for more information.

New hair!!

OMG, so excited! There will be much more about this in an upcoming post, but for now I want y'all's input. I've gotten a bit crazy in the last month!

For years, I've wanted to have crazy color chunks in my hair, but I haven't really been brave enough to try it. However, due to an awesome opportunity (details soon!) I'm doing it! I've got the color kit already, and it came with three colors: Cherry Red, Royal Blue, and a Burgundy color. I'm going to bleach a few chunks of hair, then put a color or two onto it.

My dilemma? I don't know which color(s) to try first! I'm leaning toward the cherry red, but I just can't decide. Thoughts?

Also, I've made a fun change to my hair. Instead of having hair to my butt, I've cut it to above bra strap length! I've been cutting a bit every few days/weeks. After the fourth cut this morning, it's now short (for me) and layered and adorable! I sort of wish I'd gone to get it cut, though, so I could have donated the 10" to Wigs for Kids. I've donated hair to them before, and it was such a rewarding experience!

So- thoughts? Blue, red, or burgundy, or a mix? Leave me a comment!

I haven't had funky colors in my hair since high school!

See my disclosure statement for more information.

Withdrawing

It's strange, lately. Normally, I'm a very upbeat cheerful person. Optimistic to a fault, to the point that it's rather disgusting to other people. But then there's the other side...

Chronic illness does weird things to your head. When things go well, it's easier to be upbeat. In the bad time, though, I find I withdraw, pull all my energy in. I'm not sure why... it's probably a combination of things. I don't want to bring other people down, and I know it does. I don't want to waste energy on fighting this compulsive need to look like I'm fine, especially on the days when I'm so very clearly not fine.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not suicidal or anything. I'm just so very overwhelmed by this constant state of not well. I'm so sick of being unable to do the things I want to do. I'm sick of trying to put on a happy face, only to collapse into a pile of frustrated tears at 2am because I just can't do it anymore. I'm so angry that all those plans I made years ago, schooling and working to be more was wiped out because my body is defective.

It's been one of those times again- this illness wore my body down, and then the next one stepped in and the next one and now I think I've got a relapse of mono, except that I can't actually make the trip to the doctor because it's expensive and even if I had the money, I don't have the energy/ability to ride for an hour each way and spend an hour or more sitting in their uncomfortable chairs.

I'm realizing that no matter what I had planned, this is my reality. Frankly? It kind of sucks, and I don't know any way to fix it. Everything hinges on being able to DO things, and my body won't cooperate.

Anyway, that's why I'm not around on Facebook or Twitter or anything, and that's why I'm not posting as often here. It's hard to be creative when you can't sit up long enough to paint your nails.

I'll show up again though. Probably 3-4 months from now, when this mono has worn off again and I've gotten almost back to what normal was. Things always get better, and I've been here before. I know it will pass, so I'm reminding myself of it.

Self? Hydrate, eat, and don't wallow. It gets better.

Has anyone seen my immune system?

See my disclosure statement for more information.

Happy Thanskgiving to my US readers!

One of these days, I won't be so scatterbrained. I won't be forgetful, and I will remember to do things on time or ahead of time like I always intend to do! I won't be sick, either, and I won't be fat.

Until then? I'm the fat, disabled, happy person who still loves updating this blog and loves all her readers!

Even though the past year has been hard, it's also been wonderful. I am so thankful for so many things- my family, my amazing friends, my wonderful husband who is my best friend on this planet. I'm thankful for our home, and for the ability to make art. I'm so thankful that even though I'm disabled, none of the myriad things I have wrong with me will kill me.

Most of all, I'm so thankful for the sense of humor that allows me to laugh at the things that happen. Life is too short, too fragile. It's not worth freaking out over everything, and being able to find the joy in little things makes all the big hard things easier to tolerate.

I'm also thankful for you- yes, you reading this right now. On your phone or on your computer, at home or work or school or wherever you happen to be, you make it worth writing this blog. Thank you for the time you spend reading my silly stories and looking at whatever I happen to post. I hope your thanksgiving day was filled with love and laughter, and if you aren't in the US then I hope your Thursday was wonderful!

While at my dad's house for our celebration, I pulled out my notebook and doodled a little chibi punk rock girl. Consider it today's art. :D

One of these days I'm going to have to cut down on the number of art supplies I carry in my purse, or just break down and get myself a backpack or something. Oooh, or I could get a burro! He could be my pack burro, and I could stock him with pens and sketchbooks and water and snacks! I could even name him something cute, like Armand, or Doctor!

... I think I've been without sleep too long, and have ceased to make sense. I've definitely been watching too much Dr. Who... if there is such a thing.

Til next time. <3

Turkey cake was provided by family for a delicious meal. He didn't survive, poor guy.

See my disclosure statement for more information.

Really? Is THIS what my life has become?

You know, for a long time I've wondered if my life is actually written by a group of incredibly creative, sadistic scriptwriters. They'd have to be unsuccessful scriptwriters, though, because my life is too unbelieveable.

For instance, take the last week or so. First I ended up in the emergency room with a pretty severe asthma attack, the worst I've ever had. That was an event in itself, involving a panic attack, albuterol, a terrifyingly high blood pressure, and lots of ativan. Oh yea, and grape medicine for nausea that actually made me throw up... whee.

Then I spent 5 days on antibiotics, which always makes me feel icky. But it was ok, because I'd rather breathe than feel good. Easy choice, right?

Two days after finishing the antibiotics, I got some sort of stomach bug, and thought I was gonna end up back in the hospital with c. diff. Trust me, you don't want c. diff, and neither did I. After 12-16 hours of intestinal distress I felt weak as a kitten, but so very happy that things were finally improving.

And then... yesterday. I hadn't slept in oh, 20-24 hours and had finally started to feel like I could sleep. I snuggled down into my covers, closed my eyes, and heard what sounded like a bomb dropping into my ear. A gnat had, for some reason unknown to me, flown into my left ear and gotten stuck.

I could feel it moving, could hear fluttering whumping noises as it struggled to get free. Unfortunately, I was on my own til my husband got home to help me so I was stuck for two hours with this bug in my ear. Have I mentioned I've got a tendency to have panic attacks?

Yea. I was panic-stricken, but I managed to talk myself down. "It's just a gnat," I told myself. They don't bite, they don't sting. It won't harm me, it's just annoying.

Thankfully the gnat calmed down too, and stopped struggling. I tried using a q-tip to sort of help scoot the gnat out, but that was a no-go. Once my husband came home, we tried to float the gnat out with water, but all that did is make my ear feel weirder.

So we loaded up into the car and went to the pharmacy, me and my gnat, so I could get some ear wax removal drops. I was pretty sure the gnat was stuck to the wax in my ear, so I had to remove the wax to remove the gnat.


Once we got home, I stretched out on the bed, pulled up youtube to distract me for a while, and filled my ear full of the wax removal drops. I felt what I thought was bubbling as it cleaned the wax, but when I turned to drain the drops out, a big clump got stuck in my ear. Another round of drops produced no bubbling, but also didn't remove the clump.

I had to use the bulb syringe from the kit to flush the gunk out, and sure enough- a blob with a gnat came out on the third rinsing. My husband spotted it just as I realized I could hear again. Such a tiny little thing to create so much panic!

I cleaned the other ear just to keep things even, and when I put the drops in, I realized the worst part- the drops don't bubble. That was the gnat, flailing as the drops killed it. So... freaking... gross.

And of course, now that I had all that stress I'm now fighting with the fibro flare of all flares. The funniest part to me is that today while I was sitting and watching youtube videos to distract myself from the miserable pain, I had a gnat fly up my nose. Can anyone tell me why the hell gnats are so freaking drawn to my bodily orifices? Because seriously, that was NO FUN!

Tips for removing a bug from your ear:
1. Don't panic. It won't help you get the bug out, and it will make things worse for those around you.
2. Don't use q-tips or any other type of blunt object to try and remove the bug. It won't work, and will only push the bug in deeper. It might even damage your ear drum.
3. Do try to float the bug out with water. It might work.
4. Do try ear wax removal drops. Remember, you may have to flush the ear with a bulb syringe to get the bug out completely.
5. If all else fails, go to the emergency room. They've seen this before, and know how to handle it. Trust me, they can remove it.

I am SO tired.

See my disclosure statement for more information.

Music Soothes the Soul

I did something scary last night: I cut my nails because I decided I refuse to turn 40 without being able to play guitar. Well, for certain values of "play guitar." I'll be satisfied if I can play three chords comfortably, switching between them at will. Considering I've got til August, I think it's something I can accomplish.

It's going well! I've made more progress in 2 days than I did in three years, back when I was a teen who wanted very badly to play guitar but didn't know anywhere to learn. Now I've got the internet and I'm unstoppable!

Well, except for that whole changing chords thing. That's REALLY hard!! Seriously, I'm surprised at just how uncoordinated I am. It's almost sad!

Of course, there was something that prompted me to finally act on this. Part of it was watching artists on youtube that play ukulele and make it seem so warm, so endearing an instrument that I just really want to play too. Part of it is watching Amanda F. Palmer do what she does so amazingly well. She's pretty inspirational.

So her latest song is a ukulele anthem, appropriately titled Ukulele Anthem, and for whatever reason I seem to cry every time I hear it. Not that it's a sad song... no, it's more of an upwelling of emotion that just releases itself through tears, a sense that yea, we're all gonna die and there's stuff going on that sucks but it's ok, we can still be happy. I don't know, it just grabs me.

So, if I can learn enough guitar to be satisfied with my progress, I may end up splurging on a ukulele with my Christmas money. It's not like I'd be spending hundreds of dollars... you can get a nice, inexpensive ukulele for not a whole lot of cash. Like this one!!

How adorable is that? And the front has glitter under the gloss! It's like someone decided to make a ukulele just for me, one that I would instantly fall in love with and decide I needed to own! Lime green, glitter... what more could a girl want?

How about PURPLE GLITTER??

I KNOW! It's the same kind, and it comes with a bag and an instructional DVD... I'm in LOVE! It is seriously the cutest thing ever...

And if you're not in the mood for cute? How about a badass flying v ukulele? It's so cute and little and yet gothly! My mind is spinning with ideas...

The one idea I keep coming back to is one of stripping the front of the new ukulele and painting it with a custom design for myself. Maybe something abstract, maybe my name in the corner... something fun and bright and cheerful, definitely!

As if I needed more stuff to keep my head spinning! I'm telling you, it gets weirder by the day here!

Ah well, it could always be worse. I could be wanting to raise llamas, right?

I wish these were provided by the manufacturer for consideration!

See my disclosure statement for more information.