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| Gee, I didn't realize how wordy this post would be til I got started writing! Sorry for the mental vomit! |
Like many other people, I had the wrong idea about what a pain management clinic was. I imagined it to be basically a place to go get pain pills, and that's not what I wanted. Overall, I wanted to manage my pain, lessen it, but I didn't want to commit myself to expensive drugs and narcotics and who knows what. I was terrified I'd become an addict, that people would know what I was doing and look down on me for it.
Then my pain got to the point I couldn't function anymore. Couldn't dress myself without assistance, couldn't take a bath without help, couldn't cook dinner. I fight really hard not to whine too much and try not to bring people down, but I reached a point where I realized that frankly, life as an addict would be better than what I was going through and I had nothing left to lose. I called the clinic my general practitioner recommended.
Imagine my surprise when I found out that no- they don't like handing out pills any more than I like taking them. They've supported my choices to experiment with exercise, diet changes, weight changes. They've given me medication to control the pain when I need it, and have helped me taper off the meds now that I don't. And suddenly, I'm living in a world where even though I'm seriously out of shape and some days I hurt too much to do things, I have more days when I don't hurt too much to laugh with my family, or go on a picnic, or just snuggle in bed while we watch a movie.
Those things? For me, those are what make life good. They're the important things. The rest of it's just stuff, you know?
So- why have I been gone the last few weeks? Long story short, I've been taking methadone for pain management for about 2 years now. It worked, it was cheap, and since I don't have insurance it was the best option at the time. And now that my pain has improved, I've been very slowly tapering down for 5 or 6 months. Finally, I took my last dose 2 weeks ago, and it was so incredibly momentous...
... and crappy. Did I mention crappy? Yea, it's improving now, but after having taken this daily for 2 years, it wasn't a fun process. Add to it a bad reaction to an anxiety med I'd started the week before and I spent a few weeks pretty depressed and miserable.
However, it's improving, so I'm excited about that! I'm getting excited about life again, which feels absolutely amazing, and as a result, I'm hoping some of this will spill over into blogville. Keep an eye peeled, things might get fun soon!
Anyway, the reason I wanted to share the talk about doctors is because a funny thing has happened! My team at the pain management clinic have gotten to know me over the past couple of years, and now whenever I go in, several people will come up to me wanting to see what fun nail art I'm wearing! Some of them even read this blog! (Hi!! *hugs*) It's a wonderful feeling, knowing that even though I may be having a rough time, I can still bring a little bit of happy into their lives, so I find myself thinking about what I'm going to wear on my nails before every appointment!
I know, it seems like I use a lot of Kiss and Broadway products. But they're really good! Honestly, it seems like I reach for something from them any time I'm doing nail art, partly because they're affordable and available, but mostly because they're the best product to achieve my goal. There is SO much love in my heart for these products!
Ok, enough blabbing about that... There's not a lot to say about applying these. They're different from the nail polish appliques like Sally Hansen Salon Effects and Incoco strips. I'm not sure what these are made of, but they're almost like a plastic film. They don't seem to stretch as well as the nail polish strips, but they're not harder to put on. It's simply a matter of select a strip that looks just a bit wider than your nail, pull it from the paper, line it up with your cuticle, and apply.
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| Such a mess! You can even see one of the leftover bits inside! |
Once they were all on, I decided to add a bit of bling with the rhinestones. Since this pattern reminded me of netting, I decided to put a crystal at each joining. I started with a larger one sort of in the center, and then as I worked my way out, I used gradually smaller stones.
I did get a few pics to show sort of how they looked, but it was rough! Still, in person I liked them a lot. There was just enough interest to keep me happy without being all BOOM POW RAINBOWS IN YOUR FACE! The ladies at the doctor's office seemed to like this manicure as well, which is also fun. And next time?
Who knows. Maybe a monster manicure, or turkeys, or... who knows? I'll figure something fun out. I always do!
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| Can you believe this picture (like all the others) gets even bigger if you click it? :D |
Til next time!
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